Something is happening

[do you hear that crushing sound?]; 

March 2026 (♓︎)

it’s what the wind whispers to me

saliva jumps from its mouth onto my lips in closeness

i never flinch

we bond this way

during my alone time i am watching ice melt as spring emerges onto a frozen lake

the sun bakes

ice on a river

air for marine life melts

i feel the safety to feel reaching my hot eyes

i’ve always been a cry baby

i always enjoyed watching a river flow

i slide my hand across the lake

ice skate with my eyes followed by a sting

pain makes me feel alive

i share it with no one

but sitting with you is like sitting with music

1:46 am

finally let out an exhale

i look in the mirror and look back at me

ignorantly being a reflection of time has never saved me

but i wait because i believe in everything

i can be everything

hear the verification in the atoms of my make

i wanna be hugged gorgeously like an art deco frame

become a duo of taste, fitted by measure

i never want to be let go off

i bury my face in the ignorance of a suggested ribcage

but i have to face the world again

i’m not afraid to be a coward

see myself in everything but eventually my writing sounds monotonous

i betray the parts of me that has never emerged

the divisive,

the unique and challenging

and i become another person thats falls in line w performative  obedience

when i try to bond with others i ask them if they’re interested in being elusive with me

a soldier, a pawn, a sacrifice

will you take my hand and walk into the fire?

passion dances in our face, our bodies sweat with anticipation

humans i crush on hate to hear my sacrificial plans

i was only bonding with existence

i’d jump off that cliff if it meant distant strangers can eat plenty

i’m always thinking about the ants

the clouds that watch me cry, embracing my descent into an ascent

if it weren’t for eyesight would we ever acknowledge them?

my broken bones & bleeding limbs return back to the earth the birthed me

equilibrium is the law of this plane

gravity always welcomes me

betrays my clumsiness

lately it’s been super dizzy, understand

these tears water crops

it’s gravitational pull can compose a lake to look back into

you see the sky in the background and it makes us wonder/wander

when i dream of heaven i think of space

when i’m in a long distance relationship i feel like heaven is a neighboring dichotomy from the moment 

like a bakery i smell her purpose & business plans as wind passes it by

space as a matter that acknowledges earth’s capacity

i remain earth bound in jealousy

to be weighed

may my sacrifices earn me peace 

letting go can be so dangerous to a strangers watching eye so i perform for the clouds

are we all getting a peep into the evidence of collective consciousness?

what goes on up there?

i look around and see so many timelines

smell so many focuses and absolutions

i taste the condensation of my heart because i’m dehydrated

we need to fix that

i touch blessings like walking into a door that has beaded curtains obscuring the destination

banging into your forehead

these sounds bounce off the interiors of your mind like a injured bird sings rested on the beams of a cathedral

everytime i walk i hold onto the railing of faith

from my peripheral i sometimes watch it because i’ve been working on this clumsiness

hold your applauses

i try to remember to eat because the guy i like tries to cook for me

and sometimes he spoon feeds me

i fell on his doorstep and he’s nursing me back to life

he’s perfect because i gave him the opportunity to be

how do u expect me to fly away now?

my wings were gifted to me from god

but to stay with him i choose not to use them

this is how intense i live

i forget how to walk if it meant being dragged on by love

i’d forget how to laugh if it meant he could never transmute a darker moment into a beautiful lesson

i would finish my masters so he could attend my graduation with fake flowers in hand because he remembered me saying i’d hate to witness beauty die

but it’s never just him

i live to watch my lovers drop offers at the shrine

to tell me to never touch a door again when they’re around

to worry and talk to themselves wire messages towards my phone number because maybe someday i’ll remember i have a phone

i fall in love with women and men everyday

i feel everything always

i see the everything in everyone

i want to reach for it

always reaching for mutual attention

to be born from love how can i ignore it?

beauty is in the wind today

invisible and soft spoken

when you ask to read my writing i say no and resume to mutter them underneath my breath

i’ve always been a subconscious fingerprint glowing within society

i’m glad you decided to listen to me today

i write to continue the song

translating a primal force